The 10 Commandments for Live Music in Clubs: Patrons
May 16th, 2008 by jeff
Ok people who go see live music, you didn’t think you’d be off the hook, did you? You guys are the lifeblood of the musician. Without your support, we would never go out and perform. What would be the point? But, that doesn’t excuse you from acting like a normal human being when you show up. I know, you’re probably drunk, but even drunks show some respect. Here are your rules.
1. Thou shalt clap.
Even if you don’t like the band on stage, you clap when they are done. If you really don’t like them, it is more polite to just leave than it is to sit on your hands. If you fee so inclined, cheer, whoop, high five us (if you are close enough). We like that sort of thing…assuming we are a rock band. If it’s a singer/songwriter club, take it down a notch.
2. Thou shalt pay attention.
You know at the beginning of movies when they tell you to silence your cell phones? Basically, they are saying, “Don’t talk on your phone, text your friends, talk to your date, etc. while others are trying to watch the movie, jackass.” You aren’t just being disrespectful to the musicians, but also to the other patrons who are trying to enjoy themselves and listen.
3. Thou shalt not heckle.
I know when you’re out drinking with your friends, it can be real funny to yell stupid stuff during the show or throw things at the band or engage in general assholery, but no one thinks it is funny but you and you’re an asshole, so stop listening to yourself and just enjoy the music.
4. Thou shalt never yell “Freebird!”
It’s just not funny.
5. Honor the guest list.
If you ask to be on the guest list, that’s ok, but don’t ask and then not show up. We totally understand that stuff happens, but don’t say, “Hey, put me on the guest list because I might show up.” Um, no. If you MIGHT show up, just pay the cover. If you WILL show up, ask to be on the guest list and we might oblige.
6. Thou shalt support the merch table.
Buy cd’s and t-shirts, sign up for mailing lists, offer to help out, give the band tips. These are things that not only help us pay ourselves but encourage us to work harder. It might even get you a trip to the guest list next gig.
7. Thou shalt attend multiple shows.
If you like a band, go see them as often as possible. This encourages clubs to book the band and pay them more plus it energizes the musicians. Like any business, we can’t survive without your patronage.
8. Thou shalt bring people to shows with you.
Even better than seeing your smiling face at a show is seeing the faces of you and your ten friends. Let them listen to the music first so they can decide whether they are interested, but once they are, drag them along. Before you know it, you’ll have a cool little club of cool people who can make fun of all the losers who aren’t in your cool club (or not).
9. Thou shalt be respectful of the band’s space.
I remember going to Astroworld as a kid and riding the tram from the parking lot to the front gate. The guy would come over the loud speaker in a barely audible voice and say, “Please keep your hands and feet inside the tram and do not leave the tram until it comes to a full and complete stop.” Yeah, I went a lot. Anyway, same applies for ANY part of the stage that might interfere with our job. Don’t grab our legs, push on our stomp boxes or throw things. That is not cool. If you want to hop on stage and dive off or flash us (ladies only, please), that might be ok as long as you don’t knock us down. We want you to have a good time, but we can’t be very entertaining if we are fending off crazy hoards or trying to recover from the broken ankle we got when some nut grabbed us and dragged us off the stage.
10. Thou shalt have fun!
That’s really the whole point, is it not?
I refuse to accept three of your commandments and see one of them as potentially conflicting with those three. Does this make me a heretic, or simple, run-of-the-mill blasphemer?
I saw on your band webpage that you have played at Trophy’s in Austin. I am cracking up because that is a dedicated destination for a group of us that go to Austin a few times a year and what a dive! I remember watching a band play one night and a possum ran right past the “stage” into the women’s bathroom. Thanks for Commandment No. 2.
I am a native Houstonian who regularly enjoyed the live music scene at Zelda’s and Fitzgeralds, Pat & Pete’s Bonton (when it was open.., and other venues in the Heights area back in the day.
@Greg Wythe: I think it makes you both.
@txgroovygirl: Oh, yeah, Trophy’s. I’ve played there I believe twice. The one memorable time we got there and no one had set up the PA - it was torn down and stacked in a corner, so we had to figure it out before we got started. Then, we were asked if, instead of playing for 45 minutes, we could play for 2+ hours because all the other bands had canceled. That was something.
Last story: Went there on a Sunday around 11 a.m. with the same group of chicks. Walked in the door and yeah, they were playing porn on the tv at the bar. The guys at the bar turned around, looked at us and then kept watching. They never did turn it off, but we were comped free beer for staying….
@txgroovygirl: That is AWESOME!
Ah! From reading another entry, I see our birthdays are only 9 days apart, so now I know why you’d appreciate that story as much as I do.